The Curse
originally written 14 May 06
posted 15 May 06
The eyes of men will always stray.

Women (unless their wounds are so deep & the scars so inhibitive) will always desire the attention of men.  We will always desire the love of that "perfect man" who will rescue & cherish us above all others.  

Eve's curse has new meaning for me these days.  The pain and the scars cause me to want to hate all men....yet I  still have desire for an intimacy.

The truth is--there is no knight in shining armor to be found in men.

Since the fall of Adam & Eve mankind has been plagued by sin.

We are a world of posers.  Be honest, how many times has someone asked you how you are doing and you have answered, "Good" or "Okay" when inside you are bleeding and broken?  Or worse, you hide a personal sin (under the guise of not wanting to "air your dirty laundry") so long that the sin grows and ensnares and destroys your relationship with the One who died to rescue you from sin.  Guess what?!  When you don't air your dirty laundry it begins to stink!  

Posers are politics, in media, in schools, in the church...pretty much in every area of our society.

Those who don't "play the game" are labeled negatively.  Some choose not to "pose" and fully embrace their sin.  Their path typically runs along a life of crime and punishment.  Some try to resist conformity with the world by embracing a religion.  Their hearts, however, are still sinful and many crack under the pressure to be perfect & good in the eyes of others.  The results are usually catastrophic to everyone within their sphere of influence.  How many "honorable men" of the community have fallen and taken many with them, tarnishing the name of our Lord and Savior along with their own reputations and that of their family?  How many are there now, working & serving alongside us, enjoying our trust and our respect when they are worthy of neither?  Who can be trusted?

I have awakened to reality.  The fairy tales have evaporated like a mist.  My heart is laid bare...bleeding and broken.

Who can heal me now?

*After a day filled with silent weeping (I, too, am guilty of "posing" when I do not want to share my pain) I do have an answer to this question...even though I may not want to believe anyone can heal the deep here for the rest of these thoughts
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photo by Shirley: Sedge Fen/Apr 2006